“Pushing back” is one of the ways members of the next generation assert their independence and differentiate themselves from parents and other, older family members, and even the family system as a whole. Pushing back can be subtle, such as frequent polite disagreement, or it can be glaring, such as disregarding specific, important requests from parents. A natural part of growing up, resisting the control and authority of parents and other senior family members and caretakers is common in one Read more »
Children and wealth
Warren Buffett and Raising Kids
My friend and colleague, Marvin Blum, is an estate planning attorney in Texas. He is a really good guy and has a wonderful and creative blog – The Family Legacy Planning Series . Marvin’s May 9th, 2023, post inspired the idea for this one. Warren Buffett is famous for saying “I want to leave my children enough so that they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing.” You may have heard this quote. At a Berkshire Hathaway Annual Meeting Marvin had the “ chutzpah ” Read more »
Talking to Young Kids About Family Wealth
You can talk to kids about family wealth without talking about money. You can talk about money without mentioning numbers. These principles are the essence of the philosophy I use when coaching parents of young children in financially wealthy families. I use the term “financial wealth” to refer to wealth based on money. There are other aspects of wealth – health, community, family relationships, social support — and it is important to recognize all kinds of wealth in Read more »
Family DYSFUNCTION
What is it about family dysfunction? The large majority of my job is facilitating, educating and coaching families who share ownership of businesses and legacy wealth to help them communicate well, manage conflict, create high-functioning, family-ownership teams and develop governance for decision making, sharing information and inclusion of subsequent generations. I also specialize in working with couples–pre-children or with very young children on how to set the stage for responsible, productive and values-based lives in the context of family financial Read more »
Money Tales – Next Generation
My son Jeremy recently did an interview for the Money Tale$ podcast with my friends and colleagues Sandi Bragar and Cammie Doder of Aspiriant . He had fun doing it and I could not be prouder. Here’s the backstory. Last July I was interviewed for the Money Tale$ podcast and had a great experience. At the end of my interview, they asked if I knew anyone who might be a good guest. I thought of my older son, Jeremy, and he went for it. Sandi and Cammie’s mission is to take the taboo out of talking about money, and Read more »
Christmas in August???
Friends, Clients and Colleagues, The Christmas season (and season for holidays of many traditions like Kwanzaa, Diwali, my own Hanukah, and others) is upon us and I have made a donation in honor of all of you to the Trenton Area Soup Kitchen (TASK). I appreciate you as part of my life in some way. Rather than cards or pies or other gifts (which are all really cool and appreciated by me when I receive them) I decided to write to you here and Read more »
Money Tale$
Recently I was interviewed for the Money Tale$ podcast by my friends and colleagues Sandi Bragar and Cammie Doder of Aspiriant . It was a wonderful whirlwind of topics: money, family, life. Hard to believe how much we covered in only 30 minutes! Deep and personal; I shared all kinds of stuff and invite you to take a listen! If you have a Money Tale to tell (we all do in one form or another), reach out to me and I’ll introduce you to Sandi and Read more »
Help Others & Build Character
Helping other people is powerful. One of the main concerns of families I work with is how the financial success of the family will affect the rising generation. They are particularly concerned about the potential negative effects. I’ve worked with families for many years; family has been my area of focus in many realms. I’ve worked in different roles with some of the wealthiest and poorest families in America. I’ve consistently witnessed when families (regardless of their level of wealth) Read more »
Wet Leaves and Humility
Stories of fatherhood can be embarrassing. They are often instructive. For me, this tale has been both. I’m a parent to sons ages 23 (Jeremy) and 20 (Matthew). The older and wiser they get, the less intelligent I seem to be. I’m getting used to it. We have a pool in our backyard and we closed it for winter in late September. It has a huge tarp over it. In NJ this time of year, there are lots of leaves. Read more »
Toddlers and Wealth Stewardship
I’ve seen quite a bit in my work with families who share complex assets across generations (businesses, real estate, investments, trusts, foundations…) And I continue to find support, from families and professionals who serve them, for my ideas and creative strategies for developing stewards at the youngest of ages – before they are born and during the first few years of life. Before birth? Yes. Couples can clarify the meaning of wealth and how they hope it will serve future Read more »